I love "disco"

Gemma writes, "St Davids is the smallest city in the UK. Which explains why they only have one "disco".

To be honest, I think anyone after a good time would be better off going to the Pembrokeshire Craftsmens Circle Exhibition."

I especially like the single quotes around 'tonight'.  What night is it?  Why single quotes instead of double quotes?

"no fooling"

Keith saw this on April 2, so I guess they were fooling about the today only thing.  Also, they are using an alternate definition of "dresses".

home is where the pork is

Andrew spotted this one in Memphis.  I guess it depends on your definition of "home"...

fake ham

Mark saw this one and suggests, with hope, that it is actually chicken.

that slogan makes no sense

Lissa goes to this place sometimes and clarifies that it is called Your Place and is a Family Restaurant.  On this particular sign, it appears that the restaurant is owned by the "your place family".  Weird last name.

more "free" stuff

so, wait, first are they free of anesthesia, or is anesthesia free of charge?  Either way, there appear to be exceptions.  Thanks, Abby.

My all-time favorite animal-related post here.

is it available or not?

Well, it's available for some people... Thanks, Kimberly.

Ok, Gretchen and I agree that the quotation marks are by no means the weirdest thing about this sign, but exactly whose restrooms are they?

I think what's more important is, why the ominous "women" sign?  Also, thanking you in advance?

spaced out nose

Jim spotted this one in Virginia.  Evidently not so watchful?  Watchful other body parts?

"fresh" juice

Submitter Ellie suggests that this carrot juice is squeezed daily, but not served until much later.  (I like the mental image of somebody hand-squeezing a carrot, too.)

fake number too

Kasey saw this in Vancouver, BC.  Evidently if they show up at all, the delivery is mad expensive.

seriously

This guy is no fun at all.

(Thanks, Jeff for the link)

yeah, "safety"

Peter sent me this.  Yeah, I know all about "crime prevention."

two slogans?

Sara writes, "I don't usually take photographs while I drive, but I had to make an exception for this double-quote ad on the back of a semi in Wisconsin".  It reads "No one Pays Faster" "immediate settlements when I want"

tough "customer"

Jim saw this in Marietta, PA at the post office.  Evidently, everything about "customer" appreciation day is slang.  (click to enlarge).

come on in

Erika spotted this one at the valet.  It seems that just anyone can go in there and retrieve some keys.  Awesome.

"no tuition"

Maybe they mean to emphasize that your tax money pays for the school, whether or not you enroll.  Or they charge ludicrous fees.  Thanks, Kimberly.

wink wink

Michael saw this one in Oxford.  I'm guessing the person who cleans up the bathroom isn't the one who made the sign, or it wouldn't be so ambivalent.  But also, who flushes paper towels??

or so they say

Jeff spotted this one. I guess there is some question about what kind of disaster closed down the thai massage.

"98" Honda

Jason in Delaware found this sign after it blew off of his neighbors car.  Either the car was made in '96, or "98" is someone's rating, which might be pretty good, unless it's out of 500.

(I drive a '99 Honda and it rocks.)

less than perfect

Kelly saw this one on the storage bag for her wedding gown.  I guess the boutique doesn't want to guarantee actual perfection.

somebody else's good friday cake

Michael saw this at Coldstone Creamery.  Ok, the "pie" I get because it's actually ice cream, and the "your" sort of makes sense because you didn't make it.  Evidently you may also serve fake, non-homemade pie on other religious holidays besides easter too.

stuff my blog readers like

Stuff White People Like #99: Grammar.

Just thought you should know.

They totally made it up

Aaron saw this one in a gift shop.  This is obviously a fake symbol invented in that gift shop, and it means something rude.

giant cow, assumed name

Sorry no posts today, I had a full schedule.  And when I had a moment to spare, I called my mom.  Speaking of my mom, here's another one from my family at the tulip parade yesterday (family jumps the queue.  Deal with it.)  Meredith says, "they call her Bessie the rest of the year".  Also, it's a giant cow.  Come on, that's funny.

profit all over the place

My family watched the big Tulip Parade in Holland, MI today. They saw this bus, for a child care center that is only nominally not for profit. Really, they're raking it in. I mean, check out those wheels!

More toilet humor

second toilet today. I am shocked at the ambiguity of "flushing" that apparently exists in the English language. Actually, we've seen this very same sign in another location. Or maybe the ladies room at the same place - this one is at Barnes and Noble in New York's Union Square, so it's possible. Weird. Thanks, Simon.

"missing"

Liz suggests that the makers of this sign know exactly who stole their camera.

Josh saw this at Enterprise Car Rental.  I love the dangling quotation mark.  What was it intended to enclose?  Are we not really emptying the tank so much as, uh, flushing?  Also, this is quite trashy.  I'm glad he included a pic of the toilet.

changing the world unintentionally

Guys, we've seen a few signs change in the past, and today, blogger has changed this button that only 400 or so people emailed me about. Just thought you should know.